Monday, April 18, 2011
planning & patience
The cardinal called loudly to me as I stepped onto the porch this morning. With my arms full of firewood, I paused to just listen. What is he saying? I heard in my heart the purposeful slow beat of the earth: plan-ning, plan-ing, pre-pare-pre-pare, pa-tience...
My own heart is beating quickly with coffee flowing through my system and my head buzzing with all of the things to do! Get the garden planted, build a new rabbit hutch, install shelves in the closet, get rid of the couch, organize the art space, words words words too many.
I must be patient, though. There is still snow, and more on the way. It is still cold. I have to wrangle myself in somehow, harness this bursting energy and creative potential, and funnel it somewhere I can have results. Yesterday, I truly realized how helpful visible results are to me at this time of year. When I cannot garden outside, I need to garden my home. The planning time is where I trip up. Some days I need to just DO.
I spent much of my Sunday building shelves for our front closet, but ran into so many obstacles I gave up in frustration. I didn't have the right kind of nails, the screws kept breaking, each time I went out to cut wood it snowed or rained, the hardware store was closed,..... on and on. I finally gave up on the project at 7pm, my hands barely moving because they were so cold. While putting the tools and wood away in the shed, I lamented not having a workshop and leaving a project partially done. I began with such gusto and vision. It seemed simple and clear what needed to be done, what was the Universe trying to convey to me (seriously, how many screws can just break in half)?
Today I hear the pulse, steady and slow, purposeful. Planning. Preparation. Patience.
I find that I require patience through all phases. The full moon has passed, perhaps I will begin to wane into a more systematic approach and can get things in order for the next waxing moon.
For today, how to direct this staccato beat inside me.